Dr. Nivedita Sharma

When 17-year-old Ojaswa from Bhopal wrote these words, “Sorry Mom and Dad… I could not become a good daughter…”, there must have been tears in her eyes, fear in her mind and a feeling in her heart which she could not tell anyone!

Just imagine… a child who was her parents’ world, who had dreamed from childhood, nurtured by their love, what kind of storm must have raged in her mind that made her find it easier to give up life? This incident isn’t unique to Bhopal. It’s the story of every home where children smile but are broken inside. The only difference is that the silence of many children is invisible. Today, we need to ask them, “Are you okay?”

Truth be told, children aren’t weak, they just become lonely. We adults often wonder what stress is there in children’s lives? Neither the worry of earning money nor the responsibility of running the household, but believe me, today’s children are facing so much internal pressure, perhaps never before. The world of mobile phones and games around them has taken away their living relationships. Most families are also unable to make the arrangements that would give the child strength of mind and body.

Today, one in four children between the ages of 13 and 17 suffers from a mental health problem like depression. This statistic is frightening, because it means that one in four children around us probably cries alone every night, feels inferior to others every day, or lives in fear every moment.

Adolescence is the age when children strive to prove themselves. They feel that if they fail, people will stop loving them. Even a small scolding can make them feel like they are not “good kids.” This is why, sometimes, what we say in anger pierces a child’s heart like an arrow.

Think about it… when a child goes into a sad room, stops eating, starts talking less, or starts being a loner, do we sit with them? Do we ask, “What’s the matter, son? You seem upset…” Often we say, “Why are you crying over such a small thing?” “This didn’t happen in our time.” “Give up the mobile phone, everything will be fine.” But the truth is, children crave closeness before solutions. They need someone to listen before advice.

The race for numbers has taken away childhood.

Today, every child is competing. School rankings, coaching pressure, competitive exams, career worries—it seems as if children have been taught from childhood that life is a race. Data from the National Crime Records Bureau shows that student suicides have steadily increased over the past few years.

In the age of mobile phones, children are the most lonely. Everyone sits together at home, but conversation has disappeared. Parents are busy with their mobile phones, children are lost in the screen and emotions are slowly becoming silent.

Social media has taught children to compare. Some look more beautiful, some richer, some more successful. In such a situation, the child starts considering his life inferior. In such a situation, many children become victims of cyber bullying. Many children have to face body shaming, but due to fear, they do not say anything to anyone. Children look normal from outside, but are shattered from inside. This is the most dangerous situation.

Children need trust, not advice.

Every child wants someone in their life to whom they can cry without fear. When a child makes a mistake, they shouldn’t fear that their parents won’t love them anymore. They should be confident that they will be scolded, but they won’t be abandoned. Don’t teach children, “What will people say?” Teach them, “Speaking up in difficult times is not weakness, it’s courage.” If a child is sad, angry, suddenly silent, or repeatedly calls themselves worthless, don’t ignore it. It could be a cry for help.

Parents should also pause and ask themselves questions.

Sometimes we should ask ourselves: when was the last time we hugged our child without any reason? Did we listen to them without interrupting? Did we ever say, “You are special to us, just the way you are…” Children need their parents’ time and affection more than expensive schools, coaching classes, and mobile phones.

Understanding mental health is the need of the hour

Today, mental health isn’t a “fashion” or an “excuse.” It’s a real problem. Just as the body can become ill, the mind can too. If a child has a fever, we immediately rush to the doctor, but when a child is persistently depressed, we say, “Everything will be fine…” No, things don’t always get better on their own. Sometimes, expert help is necessary. We need to teach children that seeking help isn’t a weakness. It’s perfectly normal to cry, share your problems, and talk to a counselor.

What kind of generation do we want?

We don’t just want successful children, we want happy children. Children who can speak their minds, who aren’t afraid of failure, and who have the confidence that their family is there for them no matter what. When your child appears before you tonight, don’t just talk about studies. Place your hand on their head and ask, “Tell me the truth… are you happy?” Because sometimes a sensitive conversation can do what even the most eloquent teachings and scoldings can’t.

Nevertheless, if any child or youth ever has the thought of suicide, seek help immediately. The Child Rights Protection Commission in Madhya Pradesh is continuously working for the welfare, utmost care and concern of the children for the protection of child rights under the CPCR Act 2007.

If it seems that anything wrong is happening anywhere, if depression or negativity is taking over, then the Child Commission can be contacted directly. Honorable Chief Minister Dr. Mohan Yadavji has started many schemes in the state for the benefit of the children of Madhya Pradesh, both the children and their parents can come forward to avail the benefits of those schemes as per their convenience.

If you are facing any difficulty, you can contact the MP Child Protection Commission directly at https://www.cpcr.mp.gov.in/ . Information about many things and facilities is given on our website. You can write a letter to friend Nivedita on the Commission’s email mpcpcr@gmail.com .

You can contact on telephone 0755-2559900/03/04/05/06. You can call the numbers of the Chairman and members given on the website directly. Remember, every child is precious and every life can be saved. We should all strive to ensure that no one like ‘Ojasvi’ ever hangs themselves again.

(The author is the Chairperson of Madhya Pradesh Child Rights Protection Commission)